To Love and Be Loved

To Love and Be Loved - the Greatest Gift of all.  I feel VERY happy that in 9 weeks time I will be married to My Man.  We were originally planning to get married on 14 March 2011 and now we have had to move it back until 11 April 2011, due to the decision to move the ceremony to a different venue.  And I can't wait!!!

I am ready!!! 

When My Man and I were engaged I felt very happy and in love.  It was the most wonderful day - a day to always be remembered - a day of dreams coming true.  My Man is very romantic and thoughtful and makes a big effort for me - he is wonderful - I am blessed.  For as long as I can remember I have always been a true romantic - I have always been looking for my True Love.  I just love romantic movies, songs, and for every television show, I am always most interested in the developing relationships and wanting people to fall in love. 

And so when we got engaged, it was so perfect - yet it wasn't long before the Shadow Parts of me began to surface, where I started feeling unsure, with worries from my previous experience of marriage.  It was no surprise when I started having doubts.  After a failed marriage and me being unwell, I actually expected that I would start feeling the Runner Part of me wanting to run away, especially after I had also been engaged to another man after my failed marriage (and ran away).  Luckily the bigger Part of me, this time, wants to stay (and now I choose to stay and thrive) forever.

Lucky for me, I have a WONDERFUL Mentor and Coach, who helped me get in touch with what I want most of all - to marry My Man.  I love Coaching and I am Grateful that I have experienced the power of Coaching.  Through Coaching with my Coach I was able to get in touch with the voice of my Innocence, allowing the Caretaker Part of me to listen closely to the Innocence Part of me.

And then once I knew the Truth, my Truth, my deepest desire To Love and Be Loved, to marry My Man, it was then the role of the Warrior Part of me to protect my Truth, from other Parts of me.  So many Parts trying to come onto the stage of my life.

I also love that my beautiful Coach helped me step into my Creator energy.  When I was in a place of doubt and uncertainty, I was also in a place of powerlessness, an energy I felt when I was previously married, a time of sadness and depression and hopelessness.  Through Coaching I was able to regain a sense of feeling empowered, that there are always choices - and most importantly that My Man and I can tap into the Creator Parts within us to Create our own unique and special relationship.  A big THANK YOU to my Coach, a woman who has made a big difference in my life, a woman who Inspires me.

I love the Creator Part of me.  I love the Creator Part within us all and love helping Clients find this Part within Self.  How exciting to realise that we have the power to make choices, to Create a wonderful life that is right for our own Self, to write our own unique stories.

And so after being Coached by an incredible Coach, I have been able to get in touch with what is true for me, and what I've known for so long, that My Man is the right Man for me.  I am very in love and can't wait to be Husband and Wife.  The other Parts of me, the different voices of my internal dialogue, that were causing me unnecessary doubt, are no longer around me - I am so happy that I am marrying My Man.

As well as a change in the ceremony venue, we have also decided to get married in a Church.  Our Priest is lovely - and I feel so honoured that he will marry us.  In the last couple of days I have been searching for music to play at our wedding and I have found some beautiful songs.  I have found this beautiful song which we may play for walking down the aisle http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3sE40VAIpfI and a beautiful song for when we sign our certificates http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s5qp0FQWq2M

There is still much to do and yet I feel relaxed - and that is a wonderful surprise for me.  I was watching 'Packed To The Rafters' tonight, a show I love, and one of the characters Ben was making a speech at his friend's engagement party and he said these words that definitely resonated with me "two best friends who make a life together no matter what the future brings".

I can't wait to get married!!!

Holding The Paradox

There is so much that I am learning.  There is so much that I am wanting to apply in my own life and as areas to bring into the Consciousness of my Coaching Clients.  There is so much that I am naturally applying in my own life and I love the opportunity for Self-Reflection to see what is working and new opportunities for growth.

Often it is just the Awareness and the bringing into Consciousness that can create HUGE Shifts.  For me I have been Consciously bringing myself into a State of being Present (more often, most often), being more in Body, and less caught in my Thinking or Feelings.  Being in my Body is my resting place - and from here I am Guided by my Intuition.  When I am resting in my Body, being Present, I feel that I am in my Soul's Home, My Yellow Heart.  The image of My Yellow Heart always brings me back to this place.  When I find myself Overthinking or getting caught up in the Past or be in my Worrying Shadow - I bring in the image of My Yellow Heart, and I come back into being Present in the Now.  This Awareness and Consciousness is changing my life.

In this place of My Yellow Heart, I am able to experience and enjoy Holding The Paradox.   This is a new Concept for me, so simple and so Powerful.  I can hold the Dark AND the Light.  It is no longer about quickly shifting from the Dark to the Light, or just staying in the Dark, or there being just Dark OR Light.  When I am Holding The Paradox, it is not about 'but', it is about using the word 'AND' - using it from a genuine, felt sense, heartfelt place.  When I am Holding the Paradox, I am in Balance - there is one hand Holding the Dark and one hand Holding the Light.  In My Yellow Heart I am Grounded and I am filled with Spirit, I am in my Strength and Authentic Power and Truth.  I am not just saying the words I can have a strong sense and feeling of Holding The Paradox.

In my Life I feel comfortable Feeling into my Emotions, being Present to my Emotions.  By Being in my Body I can feel at a gut level what is real for me, not what I Think I am Feeling.  And as I sit in my Emotions, sometimes sadness or pain, I can also Hold the knowing that there is Light and Joy.

I am Holding The Paradox in many Areas of my Life right now.  Paradox defined -
" A seemingly contradictory statement that may nonetheless be true: the paradox that standing is more tiring than walking."
- "An assertion that is essentially self-contradictory, though based on a valid deduction from acceptable premises."

I can be in pain and sadness AND feel Happy and Grateful.  I can feel a sense of isolation and aloneness AND a strong sense of Love and Connection.  I can feel a sense of being stuck AND know I can take a step and start to move.

By Holding the Paradox, I do not feel distressed or weighed down or overwhelmed.  Especially when it comes to my loved one - right now I am Holding The Paradox of concern about my Parents and my Man who are all sick AND believing that they are getting the care and medical attention that is required and the Love and Light from me.  By Holding The Paradox I do not waste mental or emotional energy that does not serve me or serve the situation - instead, I can be fully Present to what is needed on a day to day, needs by needs basis.

I am Holding The Paradox that I am not earning as much money as my previous Management Career AND I can Trust and be Excited that I have found my Lifework as a Coach.  

I am Holding The Paradox that my work Monday-Wednesday does not make my heart sing and does not utilise all of my Strengths and Skills AND I am Grateful to work close to home and be busy in my job without a feeling of stress.

I am Holding The Paradox of there is so much still to learn and embrace AND I have learnt and grown so much.

I am Holding The Paradox of feeling less fit and not being able to run AND I can enjoy Walking and Yoga and a more relaxed pace of exercise.

I am Holding The Paradox of feeling I have so much to organise in my Home and garage and clutter to clear AND I am taking steps every day to create a Happy Home.

I am Holding The Paradox of day to day living with my Man and whatever that brings us in our day AND the Excitement of a deep and loving bond and wonderful times for our Future.

I am Holding The Paradox of being tired AND energised with all of my Dreams that I want to fit more into my day.

By Holding The Paradox I am Holding and Acknowledging the realness and the Truth AND I am also Holding a Light, Holding and Acknowledging being Grateful, holding Hope, holding my Dreams.

I can be Present to both Light AND Dark.  I can Hold both Light AND Dark.

In this Space of Holding both, I am neither Light or Dark.  I am at Peace.  In My Yellow Heart I am Love and Light.  And from this Space, I can draw in my Sage, my Wise Self.  My Sage is my Resource, infused with energy of God and Spirit, filled with rays of energy, helping me for my Highest  Good.  My Sage is Present when I am Acting, Speaking and Being in Wisdom.  While I am Still when I am Holding The Paradox, my Sage can help guide me towards my Next Steps.

And in my Purpose to Spread The Yellow, I am Holding The Paradox of:

- I am only one AND still I am one
- I cannot do everything AND still I can do something.

I am Holding The Paradox of wanting to rush out and get busy with Action and 'To Do' Lists AND  allowing space, living in the flow and trusting the Universe to show me the way.  I am asking God to show me the way and show me how I can live my Purpose to Spread The Yellow each and every day in the big and small ways.  By Holding The Paradox, this allows me more mental and emotional energy, more freedom, to be in the right Space to Love and Serve others.

And now it is time for me to wash up - one of the simple ways I can Spread The Yellow in my Home (since my Man hates washing up).  And then time for bed - Self-Care.

New Way Of Being

I just love Wattle Trees.  Today when I was getting out of my car, just about to rush out in the rain, I noticed a beautiful Wattle Tree bush next to my car - and for a few seconds, my Soul felt alive, soaking in the beauty of the Yellow Wattle Tree.  And everyone knows how much I LOVE Yellow.

I am Consciously shifting to a New Way Of Being.  In My New Way Of Being I am Totally Present and more in my Body.  In my Other Way Of Being I can get stuck in Thinking or Overthinking or in the Shadow of Worrying, or be swept away with my Feelings.  In this New Way Of Being I notice the Yellow Wattle Trees and I love to hear the Kookaburras singing.  Very important to me is spending time in Nature and enjoying smelling the roses (literally).

  
I love that I am a Transformational Life Coach and I am very Passionate about working with my Clients when they are working at embracing a New Way Of Being, discovering and exploring their Inner Journeys.  And I am Passionate about my own Journey.  For me my New Way Of Being is about being "Present and Warm To What Is", it is about being Real and Authentic, it is about Being in the Now.

In this New Way Of Being I am Totally Present in my Relationships, I am not in a rush or having to be somewhere else, I enjoy the Present Moment.  I am Grateful for my Man and my Family.  The image of this New Way Of Being for me is My Yellow Heart – where I am relaxed and at Peace and there is purity in my Love and Connection for all.  In this New Way Of Being there is Joy and Happiness and Gratitude for Beauty and Simplicity.

In this New Way Of Being where I am Totally Present and in tune with my Body, I am able to decide my ACTION.  Both of my Parents are not well at the moment and I today I felt a sense of being uncomfortable in my Body.  My Mum said that they were okay and that I should just be at work today, and yet it was an easy decision to talk to my Manager and advise him that I needed to leave within the next few hours.  My Values came into this decision today, an easy decision for me, where Family and Love are my biggest Priorities.  I am just so happy that my lifestyle and my work allow me the flexibility, where I can leave work to look after my Mum and Dad.  I knew that I needed to see my Mum and Dad and once I was with them, at their Home, that still feels Home to me, I felt relaxed and calm and Grounded in my Body. 

Rather than worrying about what may or may not happen, which is my Other Way Of Being, I am able to rest and relax now that I am at Home, knowing that I have been Present to my Mum and Dad.

Of course, I sometimes need reminders to keep me on track in this New Way Of Being, to bring me back to being Present in the Now. Sometimes I remind myself when I catch myself worrying about what I cannot control - I say "Stop" and this moves me out of my Thinking and back to the Present.   Other times, like this afternoon, when I was driving Home from my Parents, I was lost in Thinking about my Brother and what I wish could be different, and then I see a car number plate, I feel it is a message from the Universe for me - "I AM I".  This reminds me of my Counselling Courses where we are trained to recognise that "I Am I... You Are You", and from this place I bring myself back to the Present Moment and not take on all the worry and responsibility.

 This can be challenging when it involves the people that I love.  Today I feel myself stepping into my Caregiver Archetype, which comes naturally for me. 

And yet the Shadow of this can be when I go into worry.  My Man is also sick, and it would be easy for me to create all of these possible scenarios about what this means and the fear of test results, and yet my worry will not serve us - instead I can be in the Present and approach day by day.

Being Present in the Now for me is about letting go of my Past.  I love the quote that hangs in our living area "Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a Gift."  Stories from my Past often come up for me - when I was married, my divorce, other relationships from my Past, jobs and careers from my Past,  when I was a Manager, when I was a runner.  And the Past can be great in terms of leading us to where we are Now and lessons that help us on our path - for me, my failed marriage and deep dark depression and then my career in working as a Manager has led me to become a Coach – and this is my Lifework and I love that I now have my Coaching Business. 

And the Past can also be wonderful as a source of reflection where we are able to tune into times when we felt alive in our career or in our hobbies as indicators of our Passion and Purpose.  I have recently remembered how much I loved sewing and making clothes, and I am very Excited by the opportunity to start sewing again where I have been loving just walking through Lincraft and I feel my Soul alive when I see all of the beautiful material.  My Creator Archetype is all ready to start creating and yet I know that I need to bring in my Organiser Archetype and Destroyer Archetype to clear clutter and find space to bring this new hobby back into life.  I have a strong sense of my Organiser Archetype which shows up a lot more when I am in my New Way Of Being as I let my Body and Intuition guide me - where I have a sense that I need to Organise at Home or get moving on some "to do" list items for my Coaching Business or Colllege.

I am also gaining a sense of My Creator Archetype, where the other night I enjoyed making Cards to use as a Resource for Coaching Children.  I loved sourcing images and cutting and laminating the set of Cards.  I was Totally Present and in the Moment and loved being in Creation.  I am very Excited about bringing my Creator Archetype more on the stage in my life through sewing, photography, cooking, art.  I am looking forward to my Yin and Yang working together – tuning into my Intuition to be Inspired and then enjoying the process of Creation. 

From my Past, I also have such a love of Running and I often remember how much I love and miss Running.  I always notice runners when they run past me and when I hear my friends talk about Running, I always wish that I was also out there Running.  And yet for me I am choosing not to run right now where I am choosing to enjoy Walking while my body becomes stronger, since my main priority is to have a Baby within the next 12 months, this is my greatest desire.   When I am asked the question, the same question I use on my Coaching Flyer - Ask yourself from the heart, if I could be, do or have absolutely anything, I would  definitely ___________be a Mum.  As I tune into my Body and I am just Present in my day to day life, I am always drawn to the stories of Mums and love seeing and being around Babies and Children.  I am ready to be a Mum.  Every part of me feels this Call.

For me I feel that I am Creating a New Story – there is a New Book beginning for me.  While I Value my Past, where there are many Books and Chapters and so many wonderful life experiences and lessons, I have started a New Book.  The other Books are on the Bookshelf and I am closing these Books now, no need to tell stories from my Past or worry about my Past.  NOW, I can just be Present in my New Story.  And when I am Totally Present, I am also not caught up thinking about the Future, worrying about the Future - I can enjoy the NOW.  I can still dream about the Future and have Goals, and I can be unattached to the outcome and enjoy every day, the Gift of each day.
 
In my New Way Of Being I am in the flow, there is space for spontaneity and adventure.  I do not know what tomorrow will bring and yet I feel that when I am Grounded and Centred in my Body and Totally Present, I can feel into my Intuition.  I also have all of my Strengths and Resources of my Archetypes.  The key for me in this New Way Of Being is to press the Pause Button when needed, just Pause and Breathe Deeply and ask for Guidance from my Sage Archetype, who I believe is Inspired by God and supported by the Love and Light of the Universe and my Angels.  I am Loved.  I am Love.

And in Love I can Spread The Yellow.

Another Brilliant Book

As I work from the Clinic Rooms at the Bookstore on Friday, it is always tempting to buy Another Brilliant Book.  There are so many wonderful Books and I already have about 5 on the go at the moment.  Hence, do I really need another Book?  I do not go looking for Another Brilliant Book, normally they find me, it may be me waiting to talk to someone in the Bookstore, and then I casually see what catches my eye on the shelves.  Usually once Another Brilliant Book catches my eye, it is hard to not hear The Call to buy the Book and take it home. 

On Friday I buy 'The Dark Side of the Light Chasers' by Debbie Ford - WOW!!!  This Book is all about Shadow Work.  I have studied Courses in this area, and I love that this work is embraced in my work as a Transformational Life Coach - and yet obviously there is still more for me to learn.  And that's okay.   I believe that my Course is the necessary Step for me to become a Coach - and for me to become a Great Coach, it is important for me to keep reading and keep learning, and very importantly to apply these learnings in my own life.  Reading this Book is serving as a reminder to me of what I do know and what I have learnt.   And yet as I have been so focused on Yin and Yang and so focused on the Archetypes, this Book is reminding me to also be Consciously Aware of Shadows in myself and my Clients. 

I have read so many wonderful Books - and I am so Grateful that I do work from the Bookstore Clinic, as this opens up the opportunities to buy Another Brilliant Book.  There are so many parts of the Book that I love - and I have only started - and yet I want to share these paragraphs which are so powerful.

- p3. "Your life will be Transformed when you make peace with your Shadow.  The caterpillar will become a breathtakingly beautiful butterfly.  You will no longer have to pretend to be someone you're not.  You will no longer have to prove you're good enough.  When you embrace your Shadow you will no longer have to live in fear.  Find the Gifts in your Shadow and you will finally revel in all the glory of your True Self.  Then you will have the freedom to create the life you have always desired."  I am Excited and Inspired reading these words.

- p.3 "Every human being is born with a healthy emotional system.  We love and accept ourselves when we are born.  We don't make judgements about which parts of ourselves are good and which parts are bad.  We dwell in the fullness of our being, living in the moment, and expressing ourselves freely.  As we grow older, we begin to learn from the people around us.  They tell us how to act, when to eat, when to sleep, and we begin to make distinctions.  We learn which behaviours bring us acceptance and which bring us rejection.  We learn if we get a prompt response or if our cries go unanswered.  We learn to trust the people around us or to fear the people around us.  We learn consistency or inconsistency.  We learn which qualities are acceptable in our environment and which are not.  All of this distracts us from living in the moment and keeps us from expressing ourselves freely."

- p.9 The author writes "This process seemed miraculous to me.  So I made a list of all the parts of myself I didn't like, and worked on finding the Gifts in them.  As soon as I was able to see the positive and the negative value of each aspect of myself, I was able to drop my defensiveness and allow these parts to exist freely.  It became clear that the process was not about getting rid of things we dislike in ourselves, but about finding the positive side of these aspects and integrating it into our lives."

- p.16 "Within ourselves, we possess every trait and its polar opposite, every human emotion and impulse.  We have to uncover, own, and embrace all of who we are, the good and bad, dark and light, strong and weak, and honest and dishonest.  If you believe you are weak, then you must seek out its opposite, and find your strength.  If you are ruled by fear you must go within and find your courage.  If you are a victim you must go within and find the victimiser inside you.  It is your birthright to be whole, to have it all.  It only takes a shift in your perception, an opening of your heart." - Reading this reminds me of Yin and Yang - the opposite of energies - and when we are just in one Part of us, we need to embrace the other part of ourselves to bring about Balance.

I get inspired to look up images on Light and Dark and find some great images at on this website -

http://photobucket.com/images/light%20and%20dark/

- I am loving this Book.  I love reading p.25 "The key is to understand that there is nothing we can see or perceive that we are not.  If we did not possess a certain quality we could not recognise it in another.  If you are inspired by someone's courage, it is a reflection of the courage within you.  If you think someone's selfish, you can be sure that you're capable of demonstrating the same amount of selfishness.  Although these qualities will not be expressed all the time, we each have the ability to act out any quality we see."  Then p. 29. "What I discovered was my potential to act like the people I had been most harshly judging.  It became clear that I had to be on the lookout for the traits that most bothered me in others.  I began to recognise them as rooms I'd closed off." I love reading on p. 40 "If I am offended by your arrogance it is because I'm not embracing my own arrogance.  This is either arrogance that I am now demonstrating in my life and not seeing, or arrogance that I deny I am capable of demonstrating in the future.  If I am offended by arrogance I need to look closely at all areas of my life and ask myself these questions: When have I been arrogant in the past?  Am I being arrogant now?  Could I be arrogant in the future?... If I embrace my own arrogance, I won't be upset by someone else's. I might notice it, but it won't affect me.  My arrogance outlet will have a cover plate on it.  It is only when you're lying to yourself or hating some aspect of yourself that you'll get an emotional charge from someone else's behaviour."


- I read on p. 43 something that interests me to ponder "when you embrace a quality within yourself, other people with the same quality can no longer plug into you.  Then they become free to experience you and you are free to experience them."

- p. 48 "Freedom is being able to choose whoever and whatever you want to be at any moment in your life.  If you have to act in a particular way to avoid being something you don't like, you're trapped.  You've limited your freedom and robbed yourself of wholeness.  If you can't be lazy, you can't be free.  If you can't be angry when something upsetting happens, you can't be free.  If you deal with someone's behaviour by being the opposite, question yourself.  If you are constantly annoyed by a particular group of people, find the ways in which you are like them."

- p. 50 "As long as we deny the existence of certain traits in ourselves, we continue to perpetuate the myth that others have something we don't possess.  When we admire someone, it is an opportunity to find yet another aspect of ourselves.  We have to take back our positive projections as well as our negative projections."

- p. 51 "Any desire of the heart is there for you to discover and manifest.  Whatever inspires you is an aspect of yourself.  Be precise about what you admire in someone and find that part in yourself.  If you have the aspiration to be something, it's because you have the potential to manifest what you are seeing." - How wonderful!!

I love applying what I am learning to my own life.  I am able to see in my day where I have reacted to qualities in other people and make meaning for this for me - where I have made a sweeping statement such as "I am always friendly" or when I am the Judge of someone for Judging another, or react to other qualities in others and realising that these qualities can also show up for me.  It is good being able to talk to my Man about these realisations, I am fortunate that he is my best friend.

Tonight we venture outside to watch the partial moon eclipse - and I enjoy the Light and the Dark.  And as the day is coming to a close for me, I enjoy the words of 'The Guest House' by Rumi -

"The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond."
~ Rumi ~

Big News

Today I am thankful that my Yang part of me was in full ACTION, getting my "to do" list done.  I was up and ready to go at 9am and it felt wonderful to become more Organised.  I was especially happy to spend some time on my bills, records and budget.

I was also glad to be at home and have the Space in my day to watch History, with Australia's First Female Prime Minister sworn in by the Governor General.  This is Big News.  This is Big News after 26 Male Prime Ministers and after 108 years.  Regardless of the Politics and my Beliefs and the potential greatness for Australia, I have so much empathy for Kevin Rudd.  As I watched his speech, I was moved by his words and his emotions.  I was moved by his love and acknowledgement of his Wife and Children.  I also loved that he named everything of which he is Proud.  It is true that he can be Proud of taking the step to apologise to Aboriginal Communities and also helping Australia escape the Global Financial Crisis.  He spoke well and I loved when he said  "I have given my absolute best, I have given my absolute all."  

I also have so much admiration for Kevin Rudd as he chose to attend Question Time and showed so much Strength in Character.  This had an impact on me, rather than feeling into rejection or going into a Shadow of the Orphan, Kevin Rudd was Grounded in his Strength, staying true to his Party and the Country - advising that he would continue to be available to serve - WOW!  I loved that this was acknowledged by Julia Gillard.  I also loved that Julia Gillard, Wayne Swan and Tony Abbott acknowledged Kevin Rudd's work and how difficult a time it would be for him and his Family.  

My reaction to today's Events shows the Feminine Yin in me, where I am in tune with my Feelings and Emotions.  It is then good to talk to my Man who is the Thinker and so we have a good discussion and express our Feelings and Thoughts - Yin and Yang.

Today I watched the News over and over, which is a change for me.  For a long time now I have chosen not to watch the News, at least not on a regular basis.  And yet with my Commitment to be more Actively Involved I am choosing to become more aware on Local, National and Global Levels.  I am choosing to check in with the News on a daily basis, even if it is a quick look online.  As I am very sensitive, I have a sense that I can visualise a bubble around me, to stop myself from becoming too emotionally involved or distressed, especially with so much sadness and negativity that dominates the news.  And yet there is also the opportunity for me to gain increased Awareness which may lead me to take ACTION.   

Like today, every day there is Big News - events and situations happening around the world where people, Families, lives are being affected.  I want to protect myself, and yet I do not want to be de-sensitised  or unaffected by Local and World News.  By reading every News Article or watching the News on television and treating every story as Big News, this allows me to be interested and totally open.   Rather than becoming emotionally charged with every article or spending time and energy talking about the News and getting too caught in the Story, I can extend my love and light and I can also make Choices as to the areas where I may be able to get involved to Make A Difference and Spread The Yellow.

While I have empathy for Kevin Rudd, I have also been impressed with the words of Julia Gillard.  I especially liked these words -

"I will dedicate my abilities to what I believe in.
A nation where hard work is rewarded and where the dignity of work is respected.
A nation that prides itself on the excellence of its education system.
Where Government can be relied upon to provide high quality services for all Australians.
An Australia that can achieve even greater things in the future.  We should not be afraid of the future.
A strong Australia respected as a global force for progress, for peace and for tolerance.
A bright democracy for the world to admire.
And a sanctuary for all of our people.
Can I say to the Australian people there will be some days I delight you; there may be some days I disappoint you.  On every day, I will be working my absolute hardest for you. "

These words are Inspirational.  And it is Inspiring to hear that there are already 23 Female World Leaders.  It is encouraging to hear all of the young woman being so Inspired after today's Big News. Mr Gillard described his daughter as a "unique, hard working, passionate, driven'' person who only "wants to do good things for the country".

I love when Julia Gillard talks about the paradox - that people can have empathy for Kevin Rudd and also see the Strength and Commitment of Julia Gillard.  I am Excited to be choosing to bring my Yang onboard to learn more about the Government Policies and more about the Big News, so that I have increased Awareness, and a greater capacity to make Conscious Choices, and also be open to be moved to ACTION.

Connection Is Most Important

Through getting to know my Yin Feminine and Yang Masculine and in their coming together, I have come to a place of Self-Love, I feel that I have Inner Resources to help me on a daily basis.  I feel more Self-Reliant, where I can depend on myself to achieve my Goals.  And yet I also believe it to be true, that people need people, we need each other. 

It reminds me of the quote "No man is an island..." - I Google the quote by John Donne - Meditation XVII "All mankind is of one author, and is one volume; when one man dies, one chapter is not torn out of the book, but translated into a better language; and every chapter must be so translated...As therefore the bell that rings to a sermon, calls not upon the preacher only, but upon the congregation to come: so this bell calls us all: but how much more me, who am brought so near the door by this sickness....No man is an island, entire of itself...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind; and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."

When I read these words I do believe that people are social beings and they cannot live entirely alone or in isolation.  I love the movie 'Castaway' with Tom Hanks, where he makes a friend from his volley ball - in the movie Wilson is a real and true friend.  Hanks has said that in studying survivors of various situations he found that they need someone to talk to (as much as they need fire and water) and if they don't have someone, they create them.

I am Honoured to be a Coach in that for many people this offers an opportunity for Connection, for real Conversations, for people to be real and honest and speak from their heart.  Even as I write these words I  have a feeling that this is my favourite place, where I am in real Connection with others.  I read these words in 'Soulcraft', "Soul initiation transforms our lives by the power of the truth at the centre of our Soul image.  Embracing that truth results in a radical simplification of our lives.  Activities and relationships not supportive of our Soul purpose begin to fall away.  Our former agendas are discarded, half-completed projects abandoned.  Many old problems are not solved but outgrown.  Old ways of presenting and defending ourselves become less appealing, and less necessary."    

John Donne was also communicating that all mankind is interconnected - I believe that this is so true.  Perhaps that is why I don't enjoy watching the news or reading newspapers (very often) - there is so much sadness and human suffering - I cannot watch it without feeling pain for those fellow human beings, my brothers and sisters.  I can relate to the words in 'Soulcraft' about feeling a Connection to all people and to Nature, "...pathways to Soul stimulate a deep bonding, not just between people but also between humans and the other beings of nature.  Bonding across the species boundaries help us overcome the conflicts and disparities between Nature and culture and within human culture itself.  By deepening our identification with all life-forms, with ecosystems, and with the planet herself, we begin to discover within us what deep ecologist Arne Naess calls the 'ecological self' or what James Hillman calls 'a psyche the size of the earth' - the broader and deeper self that is a natural member in the more-than-human community."

Being in Connection with others when it is real and heartfelt is wonderful.  It is through relationship that we can Value and Encourage and Love each other. I am delighted when I get two emails from friends and a positive and happy email from a past Client.  I love when I feel in Connection with others.

And when I don't feel Connection with others, this also teaches me something about myself - my desire for Connection is strong and so my internal reaction is strong - I just want to be real and have real  Conversations.  My Teacher was saying one weekend in College (I can't remember her exact words) that we are meant to be in relation to each other - that we only see ourselves and find ourselves when we are in relationship to others.  When we love something about someone, we love that capacity within ourselves. - I love when seeing the lady at work Excited and talking about the photos of her daughter from their overseas trip, and also hearing my Man's Mum talk about her holiday.  And then when I have an internal reaction to someone (someone pushing my buttons) this is usually a signal that we are disowning a part of ourselves, there may be a part of ourselves in the Shadow.  By being a Witness to myself, I find it interesting to realise that there is a lesson in her for me.  Such as when my Judge part of me comes onto the stage and I am judging someone else for being a Judge, it makes me look at areas in my life where this may be playing out.  With my Yin and Yang on hand I can bring my own Shadow Parts into the light, and also be in acceptance of Self and acceptance of others.

Being in relationship is very important to me.  I love the strong Connection with my Mum and Dad - I love talking to them every day.  I love that I can have real and heartfelt Conversations with them.  Of course, I love talking to my Man - even though we enjoy our own time and interests, I feel we have a strong and loving Connection - and I am Grateful.  Spending time with my Brother and Sister-In-Law and my three beautiful Nieces is always a top priority for me.  And now I am also hoping to build a stronger Connection with my Man's Family.

Tonight I talk to a close friend.  We do not see each other very often and yet we are very close.  This beautiful woman showed me her true friendship when she would come and sit with me and just sit and share space, when I was in a deep, dark place.  It is a very long time ago - and yet I will always remember the difference she made in my life through her unconditional love and caring.  Tonight we talk on the phone, I feel in Connection with my true friend, and I tell her that I will always be Grateful for just coming and sitting with me.  This experience taught me the importance of keeping it real and the importance of a true friend.

True friends are important to me.  Especially now as I am entering a new phase in my life.  Connection Is Most Important to me - real, heartfelt Conversations and believing in each other, encouraging each other, seeing the beauty and greatness in one another.  I am blessed to experience Connection with many of my wonderful College friends - although my life feels very separate to them - and yet I feel they are my Soul Sisters.

I bought a new book last Saturday (another book - I love books) - 'Where will you be five years from today?' by Dan Zadra and I read these words tonight -

"Surround yourself with people who believe you can.

By all means, share your goals - 

but only share them with people

who can help you attain them.

Benchmark test for choosing friends:

Will spending time with this person drag me down or life me up?

Will he or she make me want to be a better person?

A happier person?  A more successful person?  

Will he or she help me achieve my most important goals?

If not, find friends who will."

And then this quote is also included - "One of my best moves is to surround myself with friends who, instead of asking, 'Why?' are quick to say, 'Why not?' That attitude is contagious." Oprah Winfrey

I love that I have some very strong relationships and I feel that being in Connection is Most Important, most Important to me - otherwise I feel that I am wasting time or just caught up in a story or a drama.  And there is room for the story and room for drama and room for sadness and realness and human imperfection, and I want to be in a space of keeping it real.  In my relationships, of most important to me is to, be genuinely interested in each other, ask questions, listen and be in eye contact, have an open heart, deepen our understanding of the deeper meaner, the Emotional and Spiritual Journey - "What is really going on here?".  It is most important to me to feel total love and acceptance.  And this space can be challenging sometimes - even writing these words are challenging myself to look closer at my relationships with Friends and Family, to really look at the relationship.  I am Inspired in that I can grow and strengthen my relationships.  I can ask myself questions -  What is the basis of this relationship?  Is there the opportunity to strengthen the Connection? 

Or do I need to be in Labels or Analysis - instead I can just be in Acceptance and come from a place of non-judgement.  I can have a feeling of non-attachment - with no attachment of expectations or outcomes. I can also realise that all people are different and part of being in relationship is also Acceptance - Acceptance that some people may be quiet, some people may take longer to get to know, sometimes people are just tired or may not be bright and happy and friendly or interested all the time (or at any time or in the way that I naturally show up in the world).  It seems I am very Passionate about this topic, this has been an opportunity for me to look at myself, all Parts of myself - hmm... another lesson here for me - with my Yin and Yang on hand with love to support my Journey rather than stepping into a Self Critic.  My Yin reminds me that I am genuine in my Intention of wanting Connection with others and I shouldn't worry about the thoughts of others. 

I also realise that it is not just about Connections with Friends and Family.  Sometimes I can enjoy Connection and real Conversations with a colleague from work or just waiting at a coffee shop or walking across the street.  Up comes another piece to this puzzle - if I am interconnected with all people, I have a responsibility and relationship to all people.  The best I can do is be myself and be the best I can be in my relationship with others and I can be open hearted, with a genuine, open heart, always open to being in Connection with my fellow members of the human Community. 

When I say the words Connection Is Most Important - I mean Most Important to me when I am relating to others - this is true for me (and I recognise not always the Conscious wish of others).  This is one of my Core Values.  And Connection to Self is equally as important.  To me it is about Balance - I love time with others and it is also such a Priority to me to deepen my relationship with myself.  I will trust my Intuitive Yin to guide me...  

Building Bridges

Decision making - I thought I had it sorted now - I thought I was getting in tune with my Intuitive Yin and then getting my Action Yang part of me to make it happen.  I had been so sure that the right decision for me was to move away from a permanent room booking for my Coaching Business and just rent rooms at times suitable to my Clients.  I was sure.  Or so I thought.

This morning I went to the Bookstore to pick up my Yellow coffee table that I keep at the Bookstore and it was wonderful at this time of the morning.  I love books and there were books everywhere as the Manager was setting up the store.  I went upstairs to collect my table and I felt a sense of magic and mystery and energy.  When I looked into the room, where I had been setting up every Friday, I sensed stillness and peace and there was natural light coming through the corner window.  I felt like I was saying goodbye to a friend when I shut the door.  I said Goodbye to the Manager, and I had a sense that I didn't want to shut the door. 

As soon as I got to my car I had a sense, a strong feeling, that I had made the wrong decision.  It was wonderful that I now had access to space at a local Physiotherapy Clinic, which increases my flexibility in terms of times I can offer to my Clients, and yet was I closing a door (and still trying to keep open a window at the Bookstore by saying that I would like to talk about other ideas and opportunities)?  I was confused.

As I am writing this I am getting a sense that my Yang may be coming on too strong.  I had abandoned the Yang Business Corporate part of me when I was made redundant - and for the past 7 weeks I have been trying to get reacquainted with my Yang, falling back in love with my Yang.  When I left my room last Friday I was very happy with the Bookstore and my room and yet over the weekend I went into the Shadow of Overthinking (on the Yang side) and then Overemotional and Global (on my Yin side).  It is my Shadows that are creating confusion.

Today when I got home from Cronulla I wanted to call back the Bookstore straight away, and I decided to just sit for 15 minutes in Meditation.  A similar image from Wednesday's Meditation came into my mind's eye - where there are two cliffs, going right down, and I am being held in the middle - held, no panic, I am being held in the hands of the Universe.  It is a comforting image - I do not have a fear of falling down into the depths - I feel safe.  In the Meditation today I have a sense of me Building Bridges - one for the Bookstore, one for the Physiotherapy, and just the need for me to keep Building Bridges around me and a sense of more people coming as I build more bridges.  WOW!!  This works for me.

I also remember my Connection with one of the Trees that I love at Gunnamatta Bay, and I remember when I had my hand on the heart of this beautiful Tree that the wind was so strong, and I was being encouraged to stay grounded and stay strong and not to let the wind blow me off course.

My Yin hears my Soul, my Yang ACTION part of me picks up the phone and I tell the Manager that I would still like to pay for space on a Friday.  The Manager is lovely on the phone and she says that I can have the weekend to think about it.  I am happy to make the decision now and I realise that I have to show Commitment and stay grounded in this space.  I was led to the Bookstore by my Intuition and then my Shadows surfaced and led me away, only for a brief moment.

When I am on the phone to my Mum, my Justifier Shadow is in full force, explaining, reinforcing, justifying my decision - my Mum picks this up straight away, and then I justify my justifying and we have a laugh!!!  I then realise the strengths of the Overthinker and Justifier where I am able to listen to their voices of concern and make some changes that would make me feel comfortable.

I have another chat with the Manager from the Bookstore and she is helpful with ideas to help grow my Business.  I offer that I may be able to leave some of my gear down at the Bookstore which would be easier than carting everything back and forth and she is happy with that idea.  I also mention that I will come to the Bookstore when I have a Client and use the other time working on my Business.  It was a great conversation and she offers to include me in the Newsletter this month and once again offers ideas.

I enjoy some Art Therapy and I enjoy feeling into the sense of being held between the cliffs and enjoy the imagery of me Building Bridges.  I feel that the Bridges are just new and yet they are weak and with time they will become stronger.  I also have a sense that from these Bridges will come life and growth -  I love this feeling of a tree growing and new leaves and branches - and this all happening from me Building Bridges. 

I enjoy my second drawing.  I wish I could draw or paint and yet I always have fun with my Art Therapy.  As I am beginning my second drawing, the following words come to me -"Wherever I AM I CAN BRING LIGHT" - I love these words. 

In my second drawing, there is less emphasis on the space where I work, less attachment to rooms.  I have a sense that I can work at rooms in the Bookstore, at the Physiotherapy Clinic, outdoors in Nature in the park, by the ocean, in any room - and "Wherever I AM I CAN BRING LIGHT".  I have the sense that the most powerful dynamic is the Coaching Relationship and I just need the space to bring this alive.  In this picture the rooms and space opportunities and possibilities are in the centre and yet there is more emphasis now on the magic and mystery on the outside and for me to be out in Community to Spread The Yellow and keep Building Bridges.

When I was just in moments of silence, not thinking, I had an insight that this was never a choice between the Bookstore permanent room or the flexible room at the Physio Clinic - instead I can be in Celebration that I now have more space available to build my Business.

I practice Coaching on myself and I practice Visualisations.  I Visualise my Business in September where my Goal is to be working with 5-7 Coaching Clients per week - in my Visualisation I see myself in the room in the Bookstore and I feel Excited that I am working with Clients.  Another time, I close my eyes and I am guided to Helicopter up and look at this from a new view, I feel happy in this space.

While I am a Coach and I am trained to facilitate Coaching with others - this experience shows me that I am only human, and that I am on my own Journey.  I feel that I am still getting to know all parts of myself, getting to know the main parts of myself being Yin and Yang, and that I need to continue to be a Witness to myself and look out for those parts in my Shadows and welcome them back into the light.  I also have to face my fears - rather than running away, I need to stand strong and stay grounded.  I feel that there is a lesson and perhaps something deeper going on for me here - and I enjoy talking with my Mum today about what I was like as a teenager, about myself now, and in terms of similarities to my Mum.  I love 'Soulcraft' and there are so many wonderful words - I love this paragraph -
"...opening to your sacred wound allows you to genuinely fall in love with yourself.  You come to see yourself so deeply you form an intimate relationship with the person you most truly are.  What's more, you recover a treasure to carry into life, and thereby contribute to the redemption of the world - your family, community, and species." 

Today I am Inspired to connect with an image of my Goddess - an image that feels right and that I can recapture in my mind's eye.  I search Google images and then I find a beautiful art gallery of beautiful Goddess artwork http://www.josephinewall.co.uk/goddesses.html

There are so many beautiful images and then I find the one that resonates with me - this is my Goddess.

I love this image - this beautiful Goddess - being in the moment - in Communion with Nature, Light and Glowing.  This Goddess is within me, and I can choose to bring her to life.

I feel Inspired today and I am happy - it helps that my Mum is in good spirits and we enjoyed a really great phone conversation chatting together.  My Mum tells me I just need to be true to myself, that we are all different and that I just have to be myself.  My Mum also tells me to enjoy every day, enjoy every moment.  I wish my Mum had the Internet at home - my Mum has always said that I am a great writer (my Mum loves me), and I know my Mum would love reading my Blog. 

I am also happy that we now have hot water and I enjoyed a hot bath tonight (ENJOYED!!) - and now I am happy to be at home with my Man and watching a love story that I love.  I am Grateful for the Gifts of today.

Self-Love

This morning before I go for my morning walk - I look to my Love Life book and read -

"Love Yourself"
"The greatest Gift you will ever
receive is the Gift of Loving
and Believing in Yourself.  
Guard this Gift with Your Life.
It is the only thing that will
ever truly be Yours."
Tiffany Loren Rowe

On my walk I reflect on these words.  My Yin and Yang can relax and just see what shows up today (and I will be a witness and observer of my own mind and process).  I don't need the power of Yin-Yang to help me on my run.  My Yin - the feminine part of me is relaxed, smelling the roses, intuitively being guided around the park and loving the beauty and uniqueness of each Tree.  My Yang - the masculine part of me, is thinking about Self-Love - reflecting on the past 4 years before I met my Man - I am curious how I could let myself be treated so badly?  I am curious - was this lack of common sense, lack of logic - was I just so in love with the wrong men - did I just want to be loved so much, that I was willing to settle for less than what I deserved - simply it seems, I had a lack of self-esteem and Self-Love.  I was definitely so caught up in Yin, being all sexy and loving - being in my heart - and definitely abandoned my Yang, the thoughts in my head.

The last 2 years in becoming a Coach have been an amazing journey.  Words cannot articulate or express this wonderful experience.  I have been inspired by 3 wonderful woman, teachers, mentors - who with passion and humily show me their love of their work and desire to serve.  I am also touched that they have shared their own journeys - and do not claim to be perfect or have all the answers, as they are on their own journey, they are only human.  And yet with time and experience, they have learnt to tap into their own strengths and resources, that help them survive and thrive. 

These woman Inspire me to be real and authentic.  That is one of the reasons I have started this Blog.  I believe in being real and authentic - long gone are my own masks, or my endeavour to be perfect.  My mentors have taught me that I can still be on my own journey, and yet still, so powerfully, have a passion and the skills and insights to help others on their journey.  I do not need to have all the answers - as I believe that people are creative, resourceful and whole - and everyone has the power and answers within - to check in, with what is right for them - and in my Coaching, I can offer support, facilitate awareness and help my Clients put their dreams into action. 

While I can't wait to get started as a Coach - life Balance will always be important to me - as well as honouring and being a witness to my own journey.  Self-Care and Self-Love. 

Self-Love for me is now getting to know myself and accessing all parts of myself so that I may SHINE and Spread The Yellow.  It is about my Yin and Yang working together - and embracing each other - loving each other.  

I am more Yin - I am Intuitive,  I love the big picture, love ideas and I am imaginative - I am also a Feeler, basing my decisions on how they will impact people - and a Perceiver, I love flexibility and like to keep my options open - I am great at generating alternatives and true to Myers-Briggs Typology, I am surrounded by clutter and I love variety.  Yin is easy for me.  I actually love my Yin, my feminine part of me.

It is my Yang part of me that I need to get working to help my dreams and goals come true.  After years of working in the corporate world, I do have some Yang muscle - the Thinker part of me is a friend I have always relied on - logical and analytical - sometimes the Shadow part of me comes up and I can go into Overthinking or Judging - and as I observe myself - and bring the Shadows to the light - I get back on track.  Looking back on certain corporate jobs, there were certainly many times of stress - and so I have recently, happily, released my Yang - loving the freedom of my Yin, feminine, flowing part of me.

And yet now I am realising that to release my own MAGNIFICENCE (love this word!!) - I must get my Yang, masculine part of me, working for my Yin - I can choose to use my Yang resources - being practical and detail-oriented, organised and ordered, setting and making my own deadlines.  I CAN CHOOSE!  I have the capacity to be Yin and Yang, Intuitive and Sensory, Feeler and Thinker, Perceiver and Judger.  I can choose to use all these resources - my Yin has the imagination and the colour and the creativity and my Yang is my feet on the ground, my marathon runner, getting it done - getting it done for his beloved Yin.

I am excited by the power of Yin-Yang working together - in fact I am gaining more clarity and achieving my Goals faster - some key Wins for me in the last few weeks since I learnt about Yin and Yang, and am choosing to be a witness, an observer to myself, have been:

- Designing my business card which goes to print tomorrow - my Yin has been having a ball for months, and kept sketching and drawing and sketching and drawing, loving coloured pencils and crayons - and then finally my Yin invited my Yang to help her get this project happening - my Yin and Yang working together with a Graphic Designer to make this happen

- My running, where I have been wanting to get back into running for 1 year - running for a while, then getting injured, etc - usually I have been too much in Yang, the Thinker and Overthinker Shadow, worried about my back and health concerns - yet with my Yin-Yang in harmony - I am loving my running and feeling free and in the flow - and building up my time to 43 minutes - the most I have run in over a year

- My cooking - I am absolutely loving how my Yin-Yang parts of me are working together to create healthy, vegetarian dishes - this has been a Goal for me for a long time - I have probably been talking about this for a year - now I am loving this - my Yang reminding my Yin that we need to get groceries, my Yin having so much fun exploring the fruit and vegetable shop, Yang looking up some ideas for inspiration, Yin adding her own ingredients, pizzaz. 

 

Just tonight I loved Cooking a Vegetarian dish - a Tofu and Vegetable stir-fry - loved it - chopping up a huge array of vegetables, cooking Tofu in lime olive oil (always brings great memories from our trip to the Hunter), soy and sweet chilli sauce, mixing in the vegetables, and once in the serving dish, throwing on some fresh cherry tomatos (cut in half) and fresh lime juice.  Delicious!!! 

 

I love cooking healthy meals and running - as this makes me feel good - and is an important part of my Self-Care and helps with my Self-Love.  Although, I can also accept and have Self-Love for all parts of me.

I am also learning that Self-Love and the opinion I have of myself is the most important and I don't need to rely or crave positive reinforcement from others.  I can be my own best friend.  I can just be myself.

And of course, it is always lovely and encouraging to get positive feedback or compliments from others - such as today, I was so touched and excited to receive an Award at work - it is called 'The Peer Award' - I was so touched to have my Manager say a nice speech about me and have colleagues come up to me and congratulate me and say they voted for me and why they chose me.  It was beautiful.  It was definitely an experience, through Connection and Intention, of Spread The Yellow to me.

         

It makes me Happy.

I am Happy.

Happy to want to keep Creating.  Tonight while creating in the kitchen (thanks again Christie for all your inspiration) I was playing Shania Twain.  Without surprise or reaction, I listened to a song that had been played at my wedding, the first dance with my now ex-husband – "From This Moment". Listening to these words tonight did not bring me sadness or take me down the road of looking at the past - instead, I felt inspired to nurture my own Self-Love - my own Yin-Yang love story – I love the words - "My dreams came true because of you" - and that is true for the love story of my own Yin and Yang - by maximising the abilities and potential of each part of me, I am making my dreams come true - here is a clip - really love this song - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhS2zI_IXGM&feature=related.  I also love her other songs including - "I Won't Leave You Lonely" - these words are also great - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7fjMBPFmt4.

So where to from here - what is my next project that is calling my Yin-Yang?  As I am more geared towards Yin, I am definitely prone to clutter - so I have to get my Yin-Yang energy working together to get my study and work area clean, ordered, organised - and my finances and bills in order - my Yin needs my Yang - I start tomorrow...

Steps Towards My Goals

This morning when my alarm sounded, I was still tired - I pressed the snooze button a couple of times - I was tired, I went to bed late last night.  And my Yin is wanting to sleep, there is still time to sleep before it would be urgent to get up for work.  And yet I remember that I have a Goal - a Running Goal - and I can choose to train to achieve my Goal - I can choose to take Steps Towards My Goals.

Lying in bed, drifting in and out of sleep, I remember one of my favourite verses - The Invitation.  I just love The Invitation and love the part - "I want to know if you can get up, after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done, to feed the children" - I am weary and tired and one day I will have children - and for now my Goals are like my children - so yes - I can get up to feed the children.

Here are the words of The Invitation - Oriah Mountain Dreamer - Canadian Teacher and Author -

"It doesn't interest me what you do for a living
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. 

It doesn't interest me how old you are
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
for love
for your dreams
for the adventure of being alive. 

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon...
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life's betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain. 

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it. 

I want to know if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your
fingers and toes
without cautioning us to
be careful
be realistic
to remember the limitations of being human. 

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself. 

If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy. 

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day. 

And if you can source your own life
from its presence. 

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand on the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
"Yes."  

It doesn't interest me
to know where you live or how much money you have. 

I want to know if you can get up
after a night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children. 

It doesn't interest me who you know
or how you came to be here. 

I want to know if you will stand
in the center of the fire
with me
and not shrink back. 

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom
you have studied. 

I want to know what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away. 

I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments." 

So I get up and go running - I have a time to beat - my Yang part of me is keeping a record of my times as I progressively run for a longer period of time - so I have 34 minutes to beat.  I am so happy once I start running - I just love to run - and it is definitely helping having a Goal - I am feeling motivated and also get excited when I achieve Wins along the way.

Today's run showed me the strength of my Yang part of me and my Yin part working together.  

 

Sometimes when I go out running my Yang gets into the Shadow of Overthinker - busy busy thinking - thinking about all I need to do - or thinking that I am getting tired or thinking about trying not to think - and the run is more of a struggle - and I miss the scenary.  Yet today my Yang was literally my feet on the ground, in action - yet very relaxed - and my Yin part of me was loving being present to my surroundings, loving seeing the Trees and the plants and the colour and feeling the warm sun and hearing the birds singing.  My Yin enjoyed looking at the world with curiosity, as if I was stepping into the world for the first time, seeing all the beauty.  

My Yin was also in delight seeing the beauty in the simplicity and creativity and energy - seeing a coathanger serving as a car aerial and shaped like Australia - seeing a recycled bin with stickers of leaves that covered the bin (although perhaps there is something ironic about producing stickers for bins which encourage us to recycle and do what we can for the environment??) and then my favourite was a beautiful laborador bounding to race their best friend, a man riding a bike, no leash, just freedom for all.   

My Yin also loves being imaginative - seeing the eucalyptus trees - I imagined koalas climbing, relaxing in the trees - that would be a beautiful sight - and of course tonight I look up koalas and I just love this image...

It was wonderful to run 36 minutes today and I felt great - great that I was taking Steps Towards My Goals - but very much, just feeling great that I had been out running, I love to run.  When I got home I was running up my street and as a ran past a maple tree, my Yin energy imagines that the leaves of the tree are hands clapping and cheering me for finishing my run and congratulating me for achieving what I set out to do today.  I love maple trees - I love that the leaves are shaped like hands - when I see these trees, it makes me think of the saying "Many Hands Make Light Work".  And today, all these hands were my cheering squad.  I also love that the maple trees are deciduous - the leaves in autumn are magical.  Here are 2 of my clapping hands from my local, neighbourly, friendly maple tree...

 

As well as my running Goals, I am also excited to be getting close to printing my business cards for my business - it is very exciting to be taking Steps Towards My Goals of starting my Coaching Business.  My Yin energy is loving the creating and process of designing artwork - and my Yang energy is working hard with the Graphic Designer and Artist to get this right and get this "done".

It is an exciting time...