Dear God

In one day, one moment, your life can change.  Today at 11.20am I received a call from my Mum and Dad - I was sitting there waiting for the call. My Mum has been the specialist and she has found out that the brain tumor has grown - it is not the news that we want to hear.  I have been Praying and Praying and I feel an instant sadness when my Mum tells me about her MRI results.  I wish that I had have been with my Parents at the specialist, so that I could ask more questions.  I feel helpless right now. 

My Mum is Positive and after a few Conversations, my Mum offers that she will ring her own specialist (who is away for 2 weeks) and ask his opinion - yes, yes, this seems like the best Next Step.

This morning in my Meditation I felt that I had fear inside me and I practiced the NLP Technique of looking at the fear, taking it out of your body and then letting it go above you, around you, through you, so that it was now behind you.  I then had a sense of standing close to glass, and my Mum is behind the glass and I am just standing watching, so close and I am sending so much Yellow light to my Mum, and I have an image of my Man coming to stand with me and holding my hand.  I was sending Yellow rays all morning.  And then I received the call, and everything stopped - most of the day I have felt in a cloud, a dark, rainy cloud - laughter and smiles and lightness and brightness do not feel close to me right now.

There is so much out of my control right now, and worrying about what might happen or what this all means will not be helpful.  Right now I just feel sad and numb.

I speak to one of my close friends, and she tells me that her older parents are also not very well - where she is now being her Dad's full-time carer.  My friend was also saying, how easily, so unexpectedly, life can change.  There was a Gift in talking to my friend, she said that she is just cherishing every day with her Dad - really enjoying the time that they have together.  So much truth in these words.

On Saturday I had such a great day with my Mum and Dad - we enjoyed walking and talking and laughing.  These are some of my happiest times, just enjoying time together.  I love seeing my Mum smile.

I refer to my 'Law Of Attraction' book by Michael J. Losier - I have a feeling that I need to get this working for me - I need to get this working for my Mum.  I often talk about the Law Of Attraction and now I am motivated to learn more.

"Have you noticed that sometimes what you need just falls into place or comes to you from an out-of-blue telephone call?  Or you've bumped into someone on the street you've been thinking about?  Perhaps you've met the perfect client or life partner, just by fate or being at the right place at the right time.  All of these experiences are evidence of the Law Of Attraction in your life.  Have you heard about people who find themselves in bad relationships over and over again, and who are always complaining that they keep attracting the same kind of relationship?  The Law Of Attraction is at work for them too.  The Law Of Attraction may be defined as: I attract to my life whatever I give my attention, energy and focus to, whether positive or negative."

I also like these words "What you radiate outward in your thoughts, feelings, mental pictures and words, you attract into your life." Catherine Ponder, Dynamic Law of Prosperity

I read on "Every single moment you have a mood or a feeling.  In this moment right now, the mood or feeling you are experiencing is causing you to emit or send out a negative or positive vibration... For example, when a person wakes up first thing Monday morning feeling a little bit cranky and irritated, they are sending out a negative vibration, the Law Of Attraction responds, matching the vibration they are sending and giving this person more of the same." As I read this passage, it makes me realise that I need to be focusing on my Mum's track record of always beating cancer, she has a hurdle and then she has an operation or a treatment and she is well again.  My Mum is well, my Mum is feeling well and healthy.

I am really enjoying what I am reading - this book is an easy read and it makes sense - it is all a very good reminder to me today - "When you make a statement containing the words don't, not or no, you are actually giving attention and energy to what you don't want.  Simply ask yourself 'SO, WHAT DO I WANT?'"  I could sit here and say I don't want my Mum to get sick - instead I must choose my words - I want my Mum to be well and live to old age to see her Grandchildren grow up.

I like reading about "Contrast" and the step that needs to be taken when I recognise  "Contrast" - "Contrast... anything you don't like, doesn't feel good, or causes you to be in a negative mood.  The moment you identify something in your life that feels like contrast and you spend time complaining about it, talking about it, or declaring that you don't want it, you are offering a negative vibration.  The Law Of Attraction then responds to your negative vibration by giving you more of the same... By observing contrast and identifying it as something you don't want, you become clearer about what you do want.  Simply ask yourself 'So, what do I want?'"

First step is to Identify My Desire - I will repeat (and rewrite these words) - I want my Mum to be well and live a healthy life to old age to see her Grandchildren grow up.  I want my Mum to be with me when I get married and have children (although my Man tells me that I write in my Blogs too much about having children - hmm... this is not a good sign - and yet I am not going to focus on this tonight - and I will  maintain my clear Vision for my future which includes having children - and definitely includes my Mum seeing my Baby and enjoying my Baby growing up).

I really like this part of the Law Of Attraction, reinforcing the importance of being Grateful - "If you like what you are observing, then celebrate it, and in your celebration you will get more of it."  I am in Celebration of he wonderful times I spend with my Mum and look forward to so many more wonderful times, happy days together.

I love my Mum and my plan is to stay positive and send out positive vibrations that Mum will get the help that she needs to be well and healthy.  I am in Celebration of every phone call, every day spent with my Mum, every day I hear my Mum's happy, positive voice.

I love the concept of the "Vibrational Bubble" and as suggested in the book - "If you build your desire list and put it away in your sock drawer, your desire won't manifest because the Law Of Attraction doesn't respond to things in a sock drawer.  It only responds to what is currently in your Vibrational Bubble."  I will be Conscious of including in my Vibrational Bubble:

- talking about my desire

- noticing something I like

- daydreaming about my desire

- visualising my desire

- when I say yes to something

- when I remember something positive

- when I'm observing something positive

- when I'm praying about my desire
- when I'm celebrating something I like.

I am also Conscious of my Yellow bubbles - using the Law Of Attraction to Spread The Yellow to my Mum and putting positive images and thoughts out into the Universe.

As I read and write about the Law Of Attraction,  I have a sense that I should Pray again.  I have been Praying - I was Praying last night and this morning - and I know that God is close by to me and my Family.

Dear God, I am sorry that I sometimes forget to pray to you, or even say hello.  And, I am always Grateful, every day, for the beauty of the world.  Thank you God.  Please bless my Mum, heal my Mum.  I need my Mum.  Please send your love and light and healing power and miracles.  I thank you God for helping my Mum be so brave and positive and strong.  Please keep a watch over my Mum and send your angels to look after my Mum and help her contine to be healthy and well and live a long and healthy life.  Thank you God.